icarus. 

thewrathofheaven:

It was the dawning–the beginning of battle, a war; the end of all beginnings. The fleet that occupied the channel was monstrous, and to consider anything short of success was laughable. Cao Wei’s armada doubled, if not tripled that of the coalition forces of Shu and Wu; victory would be decisive and swift, and it would shatter the morale and momentum of the opposing militias. To say that Cao Cao was confident was nothing short of the truth, and quite frankly, he had every reason to be.

–But it was at the heart of the argosy that Cao Cao stood, eyes cast out towards the setting sun as it painted the shear, rocky cliffs in hues of scarlet and titian. At his back, darkness had already overtaken the sky, and the torches lining distant encampments flickered in the stillness upon the shore. His eyes narrowed then, mind shifting from confidence to morbid remembrance through the silence punctuated only by the sloshing of water beneath each rocking boat, and he thought on how Ang might have shared great pride in Wei’s accomplishments thus far, in comparison to Pi’s grave silence.

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Two compare vastly different individuals was unreasonable, but also unavoidable. While much had fallen into Cao Pi’s favour after the untimely death of Cao Cao’s eldest son, much more pressure also befell his shoulders. Expectations that might have never seemed significant, accomplishments that never quite compared to that of Ang’s, and a lifestyle Cao Cao expected. Ang was, indeed, the perfect fit to take Wei’s reins once Cao Cao’s time had come to pass, but not all played out as he had initially planned or desire. Nothing did, truth be told, but that was life despite his attempt keep control.

“Zihuan,” he began abruptly, to draw his son’s attention; breaking from his own thoughts to share eventual wisdom. A lesson, but also warning. “Were Zixiu here, where do you believe you would now be?” Cao Cao’s favourtism was evident–for Ang was not only the eldest, but talented and loyal. In his youth, Pi had been quiet, though differently than he was now. Mengde expected much–as he did of anyone with notable worth–but with his son, it was exponentially more.

     “–And where do you expect to be going forward?”

     And how beautiful the sunset looked in the unreachable sky above. Yet even on an auspicious day as this with victory surely in sight, not a shred of joy could be seen on Cao Pi’s face. He merely looked onward, expression calmed as his eyes trailed along the horizon of ships. He had little desire to celebrate until the battle was over and won, merely feeling anxious as the time for war drew nearer.

     Unlike his father, Cao Pi’s thoughts did not wander to that of Ang’s demise; so the mention of his name caught him by surprise. Cao Pi inwardly grew discomfort in the memory of his elder brother - he recalled a perfect man. He was filial, he had courage, intelligence, and the capability of taking the reins when the time would come. Horrid a loss it had been, but yet even greater for his father. When he thought about it, he realized that he was now about as old as Ang was when he perished. Cao Pi thought in absolute sincerity that if it could bring his brother back, he would give up the potential of succession in a heartbeat. But it was those wistful thoughts that would lead him nowhere.

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     “Were he here…” Cao Pi contemplated briefly before shaking his head. “In truth, I do not know. I rarely consider the what ifs beyond what could be done better next time. They bring nothing but yearning for what cannot be had. All that I know is that I would not be here, standing beside you.”

     His gaze would leave his father, instead turning to the mass of ships. “I cannot be him. He was a person of his own - henceforth, I strive to better myself. The future is unpredictable… but I do not want to live in the shadow of another forever.”

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痛みさえも 味方にして

Cao Pi.

Independent roleplay blog for Cao Pi from Dynasty Warriors/ROTK. Semi-historical. Multi-ship, OC friendly, crossovers encouraged!

Please take the time to read the rules, thank you in advance.

打ち破れ空を

est 2014
remade in july 2015

written by kuri.